Married Without a Spouse

Posted by Scott Williams
3 Comments
October 23, 2007
Life Application | Love | Strategy

Last week I was visiting with a lady who is currently going through a divorce.  As we were talking, I realized that she is in a really difficult situation because she is basically “Married Without a Spouse.”  In other words; she has been separated for about a year pending the finalization of her divorce and is in an awkward limbo.  Here are a few questions that she asks herself, that makes her situation really awkward:

  • How do I encourage couples w/ a struggling marriage?
  • How do I engage in couple, family and marriage conversations?
  • What do I do the weeks that I have my kids and the weeks that I don’t?
  • Do I attend a small group for married couples or singles?
  • Do I feel guilty moving forward with divorce, even with biblical grounds?

These are just a few questions; however the list goes on and on.  There are times in our lives that we just need some closure on a particular situation; to allow God to take us to the next season.  Unfortunately, there are also those times when we have to weather the Winter Storm, as frigid as it may be; in order to reach the Spring.   

Are you “Married Without a Spouse” in other words, are there areas of your life in which you are in an awkward limbo; waiting for the next season?  How do you handle the storms?  Share your thoughts!

  • http://noneyet!!!!! Martin Allen

    Thank God for the storms. If we didnt have the storms, would the good moments really seem all that great? Think about if there was no mint choclate chip ice cream. I would probalby be fine with Vanilla, but not if i knew what the good stuff was. Man, I have tasted that sugar free mess they are selling now and I would rather eat cardboard. So if I have bad ice cream in the house, i know that eating it will get me closer to the time when I run out of ice cream and am able to persuade my wife to refill with the good stuff. (sorry if that was a bad analogy)
    Life is not without bad moments or about running from the bad monents. They come, just like death. The moments can kill us or make us stronger. Chances are, I am not the only one going through my bad situation. So whatever I do, i have to make it. Even if that means not gracefully or a way that someone else would seem admirable. I still have to make it because i know the good stuff is coming.

  • http://www.manymeadows.blogspot.com Robin

    Scott,

    Our oldest son is personally going through this right now—and it has been TWO years! He has been through the greiving process and has now decided to go forward, being intentional in his efforts. He recently joined a lifegroup, has started working in Switch and is putting himself in some situations that would normally be uncomfortable for him. He says he is enjoying the changes! Please pray for him and his two little girls—it’s a difficult situation. My heart goes out to anyone facing a divorce.

  • Scott Williams

    Martin- “Kill us or make us stronger!” Strong it shall be!
    Robin- Definitely praying for him, thanks for sharing! Your family is awesome!

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