Porn, Porn, Porn…

I am going to just rant a little bit this morning… so please excuse my run on-ranting sentence:  I will be honest, I had no idea that porn was as enormous of a problem as it is prior to being in full-time vocational ministry, I worked in the prison system or some facet of corrections for nearly 13 years prior to ministry and porn was not discussed as a matter of fact inmates would stay as far from sexual problems as they could because once you were labeled a sex offender or had sex problems, then life behind the prison walls was a little more difficult for you, if you know what I mean; since I have been in ministry and as recent as yesterday, I have had countless couples come into my office, and a wife sitting there with her heart ripped out because of her husbands porn addiction, secrets, lies, deception, double lives, infidelity, dishonesty, breaking of the covenant they have established before God… we all have our struggles, pornography just doesn’t happen to be one of mine, which may of played into my naivety years ago as to the degree of this problem, some statistics say that 50% of christian men struggle with pornography, more than half of the men attending the Christian men’s Promise Keeper rallies admitted to viewing pornography, and 37 percent of Christian pastors admitted to being addicted to porn, this is a problem, guys- if you are struggling go talk to someone today, expose it, tell your wife; pastors- talk about it, preach about it, let your congregation know its real and they are not alone, go check out XXX Church’s website, get some accountability, you are not keeping this from God… He already knows; below is a 60 second trailer for a porn documentary “Somebody’s Daughter” and this is an article about the documentary, you can watch the Porn Pastor Craig Gross from XXX Church’s message that he did on National Porn Sunday here; fellas confess your sins to another, seek prayer and begin to be healed… this porn crap is pissing me off! making me mad! I’m finished ranting for now… feel free to join in!

  • Des

    Great post Scott. I would agree that churches today have no idea of the magnitude of the problem. Most think it is an isolated issue that their congregation couldn’t be dealing with. There’s also the problem of lack of men’s groups because men for the most part are isolationists. One more point; I also believe men are afraid to bring this to light given the fact that their wives will freak out. If a church going man observes another coming out of the closet and watching that mans wife leave and take the kids; is it any wonder he’ll go further underground? There needs to be a second front on this battle where wives can let their husbands know that it’s ok to tell them and that honesty will bring them together not tear them apart.

  • Scott, Yes I have been thru this issue many of times with people and yes it’s killing and I mean killing our men, ministers, churches, culture, families, children and morale. Mark Driscoll has great e-book on the Resurgence.com title the “Porn-Again” Christian. I have been thinking about having a group for men who battle this issue because I too am in recovering from this ADDICTION!

    I have been open with my wife about being introduced to this at age that I was way to young to understand the trap Satan placed in front of me and I have been in accountability with Pastors and leaders that keep track on me. Throughout the years though I have a better understanding for this since I too have been living in sobriety from this addiction. Let’s continue to pray for a Revival in the Moral of our nation. I was glad to see though this adult bookstore that I had to drive by on the 95 expwy close down because I was drive by it and pray for God to close it down because I felt uncomfortable about seeing the in bright neon lights ADULT BOOKSTORE.

    Lets fight this together! Much love bro.

  • nick waters

    According to XXXChurch.com…

    The average age of a youth at their first exposure to online pornography is 11-years old.

    Of those youth ages eight to 16-years old, 90 percent have seen online pornography (most while doing homework).

    Eighty-seven percent of ALL teenagers are online.

    “Constance” — music video
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqyLRpGgxRs

  • Great article and info. Thanks for posting it. My church has done a great job of covering this topic, and I’m glad to see you’re raising awareness. It’s almost an epidemic in these times.

  • Scott great article and thanks for opening this dialogue because it’s needed. I remember when Kirk Franklin first came out about his struggles with internet porn and how the black community was very hard on him. At least Kirk realize that he had a problem and addressed it.

  • yea, porn. this is an issue. let us pray. for real. it was all around me growing up and some of my friends were into so i thank GOD i never found any real interest in porn.

  • This has definitely been an issue that is swept under the rug way too long in the Christian Community. It is disappointing that churches do not take a strong stance on this issue. The numbers seem to be increasing, but there still are a lot of churches that do not feel obligated to address this from the pulpit. We are allowing the church body to be educated by what they see on tv, the checkout line at Wal-mart, and the internet.

  • Last Tuesday, in our staff team meeting, this very issue came up. We have a gentlemen in our church who desires to start a support group for men who have sexual addictions. The problem came in as to how we would announce, and give details to this small group offering. Should we call it a “support group”…NO!…it’s not specific enough. Should we call it an addiction support group? Once again, I said, “NO WAY!” Call the dang thing what it needs to be called, “support group for porn addiction”…nothing more, nothing less.

    THere lies the problem Scott. In most churches they would rather not even mention the word, “PORN” – it’s the great HUSH, HUSH WORD in the church today. I’m with you, I can’t tell you how many men I have counseled and talked with that have major PORN ADDICTION issues.

    No more hush-hush!!! Bring the darkness into the light! It’s killing the intimacy of the soul of so many men within the Christian community.

  • Good Post!

  • Great post! It is a huge problem, and one that we need to pay attention to! Being a mom of three boys, I know it is something we need to stay on top of in our home.. even my own husband has had issues with it in the past.. XXXChurch was truly a Godsend to us!

  • Porn is considered victim less, but the practicing addict [male] will never ever be able to have a satisfying relationship with a flesh and blood woman, as his desires have been addled. I have also seen men totally lose the ability to relate on any level to a female. Anything that effectively shuts someone out of 51% of the population is indeed damaging.

  • Scott Williams

    Thanks for all of the heart felt comments, insights and perspectives!

  • Noel

    YES, YES, YES. Can we make it a requirement that the word porn must be said in every church at least 1 a month in the context of how can we overcome this plague as the people of God.

    I don’t think it’s just a problem, it’s an outright invasion of the body of Christ by satan, we overcome satan as a church the same way as individually . . . “But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.” Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.” James 4:6-7

    I just hid my issues with pornography for years and it was horrible for so many reasons: lack of ability to experience intimacy with anyone, let alone my wife; and it kept the real underlying issues hidden deeper than I was able to look into myself for to name a couple.

    I was (am) wounded so deep and satan used the foothold of porn as a way to keep me and my life bound to the depths. Once I started to deal with the porn, the deeper wounds were released and I was able to start dealing with the sexual abuse I experienced as a child – something I was never able to admit even to myself. And the gates flew wide open for real life, for God to work in me, through me not just for my benefit, but for the benefit of many and for His Glory to be revealed.

    So, yeah, it’s a BIG problem that is stealing Joy and Life.

  • Somebody’s Daughter is a great production. I loved watching it. I gave a little commentary on how the video talks about accountability:

    http://www.covenanteyes.com/blog/2008/10/07/taking-accountability-to-the-next-level/

  • Man, I hate being the voice of dissent, but I have a different view of this entire thing.

    One, odd as this sounds, pornography has been around for over 5,000 years. The only difference between what we have now and what the ancient Chinese, Indians, Greeks & Romans had is technology. Goodness, some of the stuff we’ve learned they were doing back then makes almost everything people might think about doing in today’s world tame by comparison.

    Two, though the language is changed somewhat, the Bible is replete with sex and violence and, once again, the only difference between then and now it technology.

    And three, whereas pornography might be abhorrent to many, the video above loses me because no one is making any of these women do anything they don’t want to do, at least in America. It seems like once a week we’re hearing about some famous person who’s made a sex tape that got “stolen” and is suddenly on the internet. I’m not saying it’s all good, but people are making the choices they make because it’s their right to do so, including women, and maybe it’s the liberal in me, but I say it’s their business and I refuse to condemn anyone who finds a way to make money and isn’t intentionally hurting someone else, such as with drug dealers, armed robbers, etc.

    If I were asked to make a list of the major ills that society, especially American society, needed to address, this issue wouldn’t make my top 100. That is, unless we’re talking children; that’s another issue entirely, though.

  • Very cool on this Tuesday this shit is useful 🙂 Hub!

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