It's Not A Joke… Stop Having Affairs!

affairAs I reflect on my time as a Prison Warden, I have come to the conclusion that you could almost lump each and every offender into one big category.  That category was “Greedy, Selfish Sinners!” some were more violent than other but none the less that’s the category.

As I reflect on my time as a Pastor, one of the most challenging and common areas in which I have to provide pastoral care is in the area of individuals having affairs; they also fall into the same category of  “Greedy, Selfish Sinners!”  The trends and stories are generally similar… Guy meets girl, guy and girl fall in love and get married; guy or girl claims they’re not satisfied, they become greedy, they’re selfish, they want more; Guy or girl begin to put their trust in something or someone else.  Poof the affair happens, hearts are broken, lives are destroyed and the saga continues. 

Just as my heart would ache for the families that would come visit their love ones in the prison system; my heart is crushed seeing the countless couples destroying heir marriages, their families and their lives because of an affair.  Marriage is not a joke, the covenant that couples establish before God is not a joke, those flirtatious ways are not a joke, those emotional connections with someone of the opposite sex outside of marriage is not a joke, clicking on that favorite internet porn site is not a joke… It’s Not A Joke… Stop Having Affairs! 

Still reflecting on my time as a Prison Warden, in some cases I think it might not be a bad idea for instigators and perpetrators of affairs to spend some time behind the prison walls.  Not sure if it would help, but I do know there is a different level of repentance that happens behind those walls.  It’s Not A Joke… Stop Having Affairs!  

I read a quote from author Doris Mortman, and she says “Until you make peace with who you are, you’ll never be content with what you have.”  I’d take that a step further and say until you truly know who you are in Christ, you’ll never be content with what you have.” 

Share your thoughts, experiences or stories about these stupid affairs?  Would prison help?

  • I simply love this. I don’t think jail will help because if you don’t know Christ you can’t comprehend why you should or shouldn’t line up to His Word, but affairs are destroying families and much more! Bravo. I’d love to share this to get the thoughts of the members of our relationship website.

  • Yeah.. prison time might be in order. It’s sickening how ‘common’ infidelity is when it’s SO damaging.

  • Ministering in jails gives a viewpoint that few get to have. That is the picture of the enslavement of sin. I visit with women, teach them, encourage them, see them released, only to be back in a couple months. The sin that so easily entangles hooked them again.

    I’m also the ex-wife of a philanderer who cheated on wife #2, then when wife #3 cheated on him, he went back to #2. (Follow that?) He claims to be a “Christian” — I see no fruit. I can say, though, that the recidivism in marriages that suffer an affair is probably as high as that in any penal system. Sad, but true.

    Only when the one having the affair meets brokenness, devastating brokenness within his/her heart will the cycle stop and then it will be because they make a day-by-day choice to take the high road and step over the sin that so easily entangles.

    Thanks for putting this out there, Scott. It’s real. And it’s needed.

  • amooyoung

    I’d take that a step further and say until you truly know who you are in Christ, you’ll never be content with what you have.

    MAN! That one hit home for me!

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  • Mike

    Prison and telling people to stop may restrain some people for a while, but it won’t change the heart. You’ll just end up with reformed criminals.

    Only Christ crucified for the forgiveness of sins can put an ultimate end to the deeds of the flesh.

  • deal with yourself! this is what i often tell that person who is having an issue in this area.

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