Stop Telling People What They Want To Hear!

keepin it realThis may sound elementary; however I wish folks would “Stop Telling People What They Want To Hear!” More often than not people sugar-coat things and basically tell people what they want to hear.  This happens in marriages, relationships, educational settings, from the pulpit, work environments and countless other arenas.

We need less political correct, candy-coated politician interactions and more keepin’ it real.  Telling people what they want to hear is a loose loose proposition; one person holds back and the other person genuinely doesn’t know where they stand.   These types of interactions create “The World of The Oblivious.”

Don’t confuse keepin’ it real with being rude or crude.  Tone, style and delivery are Oh So important.  It doesn’t matter if you are the “Good Cop” or the “Bad Cop.”  What’s important is that you be “The Cop” and write the ticket.  Write the ticket, keep it real and Stop Telling People What They Want To Hear!

What do you think?

  • Scott, brother, I couldn’t have said it better myself. In so many areas of my life, especially my work, it’s absolutely critical that I be blunt and honest, whether it’s what’s popular or not, and if the rest of the world would operate on this premise, I believe, our world would be a much better place to live. Thanks for keepin’ it real.

  • lauraclaireD

    One thing though, to be ‘real’ is only what is real to you. There really isn’t any way to get around being self-centered philosophically when telling other people ‘the’ truth. All you can do is tell ‘your’ truth. It’s more people hearing what they want to hear, tapping into their own self-centered instincts, then telling them what they want to hear. This is the reason the bible is translated so many different ways bringing forth so many different denominations. God and Jesus only said it one way. We take it and cater it to our lifestyles. To say that God said it differently to different people is to call Him and the bible a lie. I tell people something the way they can best understand it to take it as positive as possible without compromising my position on the subject.

  • BrentFoulke

    Even stronger than me doing an authoritative telling of the truth, is you asking for the truth and me helping you embrace it yourself. I like Susan Scott’s book Fierce Conversations on this point. “I may be wrong, but I have a sense that…” is much more likely to be received than “You are WRONG about…” Make sense?

  • I love the part about why it is a “loose loose” to not keep it real. It happens everday and everywhere and it all ends badly.

  • I agree. My old youth pastor introduced me to the idea that “leadership is taking people where they need to go, not where they want to”. I think leadership pertains to what you wrote about in this post. You have to be willing to:
    A) embrace the truth
    B) help your followers embrace the truth with you
    C) work along side your followers to fix what needs fixed.


  • Authenticity & Truth telling (in/love) @ it’s best!

    Attitude is more important than actions and the delivery of keepin it real crucial as a leader of any Ship (relationships, friendships, etc..)

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