Big Is The New Small

As a leader it’s important to set the tone for your team or organization, especially as it relates to handling stressful or crisis situations.  If the leader wigs out, stresses out, worries or has a heart attack during high stress or crisis situations; there will always be undertones of that stress transferred to the rest of the team. Leaders must learn to keep calm in these types of situations.

I learned the importance of keeping calm during crisis situations during my tenure as a young 25 year old Prison Warden.  As you can imagine running a prison presents the daily opportunity for high stress, crisis and potentially life & death situations.  I had the personal choice of whether or not I allowed particular circumstances or people to stress me out.  I would watch the previous Warden get stressed out by the most trivial things and felt the stressful impact that it had on the staff.  Realizing that it was up to me, I developed philosophy and mindset to handle these potentially high stress or crisis situations.

The philosophy was simply this,  ”There is nothing that we can’t begin to fix in “5 Minutes and 5 Phone Calls.”  I trained my Chief of Security and my Officers to not sweat the small stuff and embrace the fact that crisis situations will happen.  Remembering, it’s not about the situation it’s about how you handle the situation.  This type of mindset allows leaders to set the tone of stress minimization in the workplace.

In my role as a prison Warden, imagine a high stress situation of a full-blown prison riot.  The process that my team would undergo within the first 5 Minutes would be to make the following 5 Phone Calls:

• Call Local Law Enforcement
• Call Me “The Warden”
• Call The Department of Corrections Liaison
• Call Vice President of Operations
• Call Media/PR Representative

This mindset puts all situations, including crisis situation into perspective.   It’s inevitable that we will face problems and potentially stressful situations on a regular basis.  It doesn’t matter if the problem that we face is work related or personal, what matters is there is the beginning to a solution around the corner.  Stop Wiggin’ Out, Tell Your Boss To Stop Wiggin’ Out and embrace the fact that every situation, including Life & Death one’s can begin the “fixing process” in 5 Minutes and 5 Phone Calls.

Once a leader comes to the realization that simplicity matters and the situation they are facing really isn’t that big of a deal, they can begin to embody Albert Einstein’s version of 5 Minutes and 5 Phone Calls. Einstein says it this way, “Make everything as simple as possible, but not simpler.”

It’s not that serious, STOP STRESSING!

What do you think? 

Often times with leadership we hear the warm and fuzzies or the great success stories. There are so many great books and tools at the disposal of leaders that growth and competency should be inevitable.  The challenge with that theory is it’s rendered “not always true” because of the simple fact that leadership deals with human beings.  Anytime you are dealing with people things are never that simplistic.

A key understanding to leadership placement and roles is this: people hire people, who hire people, who hire people. Somewhere within those three generations, there are people placed in roles of leadership that they are not capable of.  In my tenure working as a Deputy Prison Warden, before being promoted to Warden, I worked for a leader that definitely should not have been in her role.  She literally destroyed her staff and destroyed her team.  Not only did she destroy them, she didn’t have the self-awareness to make the necessary adjustments.

Unfortunately the “Leadership Destroyers” were not isolated to my experience, if you live long enough and work for enough people, there is a good chance that you will work for one of these destroyers.  To help identify how these leaders or managers destroy their teams, I have identified 5 ways.

5 Ways Leaders Destroy Their Teams

• 1. My Way Or The Highway (MWOH):  Everyone has an opinion and often times people have thoughts, ideas and suggestions that can be helpful to those that are in charge.  MWOH is fueled by the insecurity of the Leadership Destroyer.  MWOH can create an environment of control, but not an environment of healthy success.  Listen to your team, involve your team, learn from your team and embrace the reality that the collective sum is much better than the Big-Headed MWOH Leader.
• 2. All About The Numbers: The numbers do matter, the bottom line is important and if it doesn’t make dolla$ it doesn’t make sense.  In business, ministry or non-profit work, it’s important to measure things as it’s a great barometer for success.  Where numbers become a problem is when the Leadership Destroyer focuses on the numbers, bottom line and measurables so much that they forget about their team of people who are making those numbers happen.  They lose sight of the “how” because they are so focused on the “what.”  Number matter, but people matter more.  Focus on creating a healthy team and healthy numbers will be a natural bi-product.
• 3. Talk But Don’t Listen: No one can get a word in or have an opinion because the Leadership Destroyer is always talking.  Not only are they always talking, they never listen. If people are not heard, they will cease to say the things that matter.  Shh (be quiet) Listen!
• 4. Change Things For The Sake Of Changing Things: Change is good and sometimes necessary to create forward momentum.  The Leadership Destroyer takes this to another level by changing things just to let you know that they’re the boss.  They are unwilling to receive feedback or go back to what worked, even if their change isn’t working.  I heard a great thought from OSU Football Coach Mike Gundy from his press conference this week.  OSU is ranked #2 and they are rolling like a well-oiled machine.  Mike Gundy said, (paraphrasing) “I try to change things up a bit, just to justify my existence.  My team will come to me and say I think we need to stick to XYZ and this is why.  Often times what they are saying makes perfect sense and I change it back.” It’s important to survey the impact, timing and necessity of change.
• 5. They Just Don’t Care:  The quickest way to destroy a team is to not care about the players on the team.  Team members know the difference between the fake stuff and the genuine care and concern for the individual players and the collective team.  Leadership Destroyers care more about their title, role, corner office and the fact that they have arrived than they do their team.  One of the things that the inmates used to say when I was a Warden in regards to leadership and life is this, “It’s All About Missouri!”  In other words, Missouri is the Show-Me State.  I’ll close with the words of John Maxwell, “People don’t care how much you know, until they know how much you care.”

When one fails, they tend to overlook the fact that it’s no different than falling

~Scott

Twitter continues to grow and be a major source of news and connection for millions of people.  I remember in they early days when everyone thought it was no more than a fad.  Twitter has definitely moved past the fad stage and you can’t turn on your radio or television without someone sharing their twitter handle.  The same is true for all print materials and other forms of advertisements.

Twitter has many great uses and one of them is the fact that it can be used to make a difference.  Earlier this year I shared an extremely popular post entitled: 50 Ways Twitter Has Positively Impacted The World. The post consists of thoughts from 50 different people in the Twittersphere and their thoughts on how Twitter Has Positive Impacted The World.  Check it out here:

Today, I’m sharing 10 Ways Sharing On Twitter Can Make A Difference.

• 1.  Share A Quote:  There is something about quotes that seem to have a profound impact on people and the way they think.  Take a quote that’s somewhere in the 120 character range and the impact is elevated to an even higher level, and it’s definitely more memorable.  The great thing about quotes is the fact that people love to retweet them and share them.  Quotes have multiplication power, due to the fact that every quote speaks to each individual differently.  Here is a recent leadership quote that I shared that will speak differently to everyone who reads it: “Leadership is based on a spiritual quality; the power to inspire, the power to inspire others to follow.” – Vince Lombardi
• 2. Share Scripture: It’s always great to get nuggets of the living, breathing word of God in the world of Twitter.  It’s also nice to learn and connect with what other individuals, leaders, pastors and organizations are reading.  Not only can I share Bible verses that I’m reading, I can read countless other Bible verses in my timeline throughout the day.  In case you didn’t know, Twitter Is In The Bible.
• 3. Share The Good Stuff: By the good stuff, I’m referring to deals, favorites, coupons, promotions, groupons, retweet-this-win-this, things that can benefit others…  You know what I’m talking about, The Good Stuff.
• 4. Share Pictures: We’ve all heard the modern use of the old phrase “A Picture Is Worth 1,000 Words.” That phrase stems from an article by Fred R. Barnard in Printers’ Ink, promoting the use of images that appeared on the sides of streetcars.  The December 1921 issue had an ad entitled, “One Look Is Worth A Thousand Words.”  When it comes to sharing pics on twitter there are many photo sharing services popping up and twitter’s version of this old phrase is more like: “A picture is worth 1,000 thoughts, 1,000 views, 1,000 retweets…”  The bottom line is all of the family pics., random moments, food pics, life moments, children pics., timeless moments etc. all can impact our day in a positive way.  A picture is worth more than 140 characters.
• 5. Share Your Thoughts:  This really gets back to the Twitter basics.  The original Twitter question that twitter asked for your status update was, What are you doing?  It has now evolved to a more appropriate question, What’s happening?   Somewhere in between those two questions is the question of, What are you thinking? Humans have thousands of thoughts per day and those thoughts can have and impact on our friends in the Twittersphere.  Those thoughts can make you laugh, cry, shout, scream and even make you think.  For instance, comedian Michael Jr. @MichaelJrComedy tweeted this over the weekend: It’s cold at this soccer game! I know a grown man shouldn’t say this n public, but… I wish I had a snuggie.  That made me laugh and smile.  Yesterday, my family and I were in the car listening to an old gospel song “I’m Just A Nobody” by the Williams brothers.   The entire family was singing the lyrics, laughing, worshiping, ad-libbing and having a good ol’ time.  The chorus got stuck in my head, so I shared it on Twitter. Here is the chorus,  “I’m just a nobody trying to tell everybody about Somebody who can save anybody!”  That thought was retweeted over 100 times and counting.  It’s guaranteed that the truth of those lyrics made a difference in someone’s life.
• 6. Share Words Of Encouragement: Public words of encouragement and/or retweets with a nice message at the end can go a long way.  I say encourage and encourage often.  Encourage others and challenge those that follow you to encourage others.  Encouragement is the fuel that propels you down the road of success.
• 7. Share Great Information: Whether it’s the latest trend, newest technology release, a great book, an inspiring Seth Godin article, a Mashable find, the latest fashion trends, questions about a product, a great place to dine in a particular city or the recent release of the College Football BCS results, Twitter is definitely one of the best places to gather and share information.
• 8. Share A Cause: On a daily basis I’m either reading or sharing information about a great cause or charity. Twitter makes it simple for us to be helpful to those who are trying to reach a fundraising goal, get information out about a great cause or share information about a movement.  The students at Penn State used Twitter as a tool to promote their “Blue Out” event at this weekends football game against Nebraska.  The stadium was filled with blue in honor of and in order to bring awareness to the epidemic that is the abuse of children.
• 9. Share Breaking News: Twitter is a great source to share breaking news…  You can almost guarantee that Twitter will be the 1st or at the latest 2nd place for breaking news.  The death of Michael Jackson was trending on Twitter before the major news outlets could even catch up.  The ultimate breaking news from twitter was from the Abbottabad man who unknowingly tweeted the raid and killing of Osama Bin Laden.  His initial tweet was this: “Helicopter hovering above Abbottabad at 1AM (is a rare event).” 
• 10. Share Your Lives: I am a huge believer in genuine face to face relationships; however I have embraced the tremendous value of Twitter and Social Media relationships.  Social Media relationships are making the world smaller and smaller.  This Big ol’ World is getting Smaller and Smaller, One Tweet, Comment and One Post at a time.  It’s always important to remember the Social Part of the word Social Media.  Social is defined as — The inclination to seek out or enjoy the company of others; sociable.  Twitter is a great place to share your life and connect with the lives of others.

10 SPIRITUAL TONICS by ~Abraham Feinberg

• 1.  Stop worrying. Worry kills life.
• 2.  Begin each day with a prayer. It will arm your soul.
• 3.  Control appetite. Over-indulgence clogs body and mind.
• 4.  Accept your limitations. All of us can’t be great.
• 5. Don’t envy. It wastes time and energy.
• 6. Have faith in people. Cynicism sours the disposition.
• 7. Find a hobby. It will relax your nerves.
• 8. Read a book a week to stimulate imagination and broaden your view.
• 9. Spend some time alone, for the peace of solitude and silence.
• 10. Try to want what you have, instead of spending your strength trying to get what you want.

Which of these 10 Tonics resonate most with you?

I’m always amazed at the wasted time, effort and energy people spend worrying about what others think.  It really is a huge waste of time and energy.  I’m not encouraging people to be oblivious and lose their sense of self-awareness…  I’m simply saying Stop Worrying About What People Think.

The reality is people don’t care that much, because they generally spend too much time worrying about themselves to worry about you. The more time you spend worrying about what people think and trying to be a people pleaser, the more you lose your sense of identity and God created uniqueness.

Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind. ~Dr. Seuss

Do You!  It’s a statement, not a question.

If you want to be great at anything…  You Have To Put In Work!

~Striving For Greatness

GUEST BLOGGER: Today’s guest post comes from Chris Spradlin over at @EpicParent.  Chris provides great parenting content at (EpicParent.tv).  If you would like to be a guest blogger for BigIsTheNewSmall.com, click here.

Step Up and Lead

We live in a world that is driven by strong leaders, entrepreneurial genius’, innovative risk takers, and bold decision makers. We study the lives of pacesetters like Steve Jobs, Martin Luther King, Ghandi, Hillary Clinton, and Condoleeza Rice. We have learned the art of efficiency, empowering leaders, negotiations, confronting weak performance, leading through difficult situations, and leading from influence rather than position.

While we have become stronger and better leaders over the years, many of us have families that have been destroyed in the process!

• The divorce rate amongst couples with no workaholic spouse sits at around 16%. By contrast, workaholic marriages crumble at a 55% rate
• Children of workaholics grow up learning that promises often are not kept.
• Kids of workaholics lead the way in drug use and teenage pregnancies

While you may have flair in the board room, today I am challenging you to STEP UP AND LEAD in the living room!

5 Strategies To Help You Step Up And Lead In the Living Room…

• PUT DOWN AND PICK UP: I encourage all parents to PUT DOWN “Good To Great” and PICK UP God’s Word. Your kids desperately need you to deposit God’s Word deep into their heart, soul, and mind. You might be a success because you can lead executives through a book study but you’re a failure if you can’t lead your kids in a Bible study. Don’t try to change the world in one day, set a simple goal of making this happen twice a week.
• PRACTICE SERVANT LEADERSHIP: We all know that an effective leader serves those he is leading. As I think about this, it’s interesting to me that we serve those at work but expect to be served at home. I encourage all parents to step into the pain and relentlessly serve their families…even if you just got home from work! I have also found this to be one of the greatest parenting tools in changing my kids’ attitude and behavioral challenges. One day I was at the end of my rope with my son’s attitude. The only thing left in my bag of tricks was to spank him every day for the rest of his life and put him under house arrest until he turned 35! Instead…I opted for the ridiculous strategy of serving him. I helped him clean his room, make his bed, and asked if he wanted to have a sleep over with five of his buddies. (I’ll never do that again) What was the result? Absolute character transformation! Step up and serve your family!
• GIVE PERMISSION: So many of us try to create a culture in our work environment where our staff can be real, share their heart, and be brutally honest. I believe parents need to create this exact same culture at home. Give your kids permission to be real, share their heart, and be brutally honest! Give them permission to respectfully challenge your parenting. “Dad, you rarely keep your promises”, “Mom, you always say your too tired”, “Why do you work so much”. Give your kids permission. And this is a great time for you to shut-up and listen! Don’t hire an expensive legal team to defend your position.
• USE THE “F” WORD: If you want to get your kids’ attention, stop them in their tracks and get them to listen to you…then I encourage you to use the “F” word! “Cole, I want to ask for your forgiveness for not keeping my promise”, “Kylie, will you forgive me for yelling”, “Tifton, will you please forgive me for making you listen to my LoverBoy album”…I think you get the idea.
• PRAY: Last week I found my old skool MC Hammer cassette tape. Team Sprad pulled it out and listened to one of my favorite songs on the album…PRAY. I believe that all parents should make prayer a foundation in their home! My wife is in nursing school right now, so I am Mr. take the kids to school guy. Every morning on the way to school, I pray for and over Team Sprad. I don’t pray a weak “God help the kids today” kind of a prayer. No, I pray a bold… “God give my kids the power to change the world kind of a prayer”! If you want to lead your family…PRAY!

What did I miss? Share 1 way that you can start leading your family today.

Life is about Moments & Memories.  The things you do in today’s moments will be tomorrow’s memories.  It’s important that we embrace every single moment, understanding it’s true potential for lasting memories.  If you talk to anyone that has lost someone they loved, they will always talk about the Moments & Memories that they had with that person.  The same thing is true for the parents that look back and remember when their children were toddlers and next thing you know they are graduating from high school.

All of our moments are precious gifts from God.  Take some time today to look at your moments at work, with your kids, your friends and your spouse differently.  Realize that those special moments are special gifts that will produce special memories.  Think about your child’s 1st step, piano recital, gymnastics meet, when they made a decision to follow Christ, football games, basketball games, open house at school, trick or treating, college graduation, their wedding day and the list goes on and on.

No matter what you do, do it from the perspective of asking these two questions:  Are the things that I’m doing in today’s moments creating the right memories for tomorrow?  Am I finding the God moments even in the little things?

Below are a couple of videos from this past Saturday of my 8yo son Jayden running the ball, one is a little swing pass and the other is a trap.  I love coaching this group of boys and they have come a long way this season, as a matter of fact this past Saturday was the semi-finals and our 26-25 victory put us in the Championship Game this weekend.  Such great Moments & Memories.

After we win the Championship Game this coming weekend (prophetically speaking), I get the opportunity to drive 2.5 hours to officiate a wedding of a great couple with a really bright future.

“If you long for the perfect moment, the perfect moment will pass you by.”

Great Moments & Great Memories.

Share your thoughts on Moments & Memories.  You can also share your thoughts on my son’s two plays in the above videos.

Nearly 50 years ago Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. said, “We must face the sad fact that at the 11 o’clock hour on Sunday Morning, when we stand to sing, we stand in the most segregated hour in America.” Unfortunately, Dr. King’s quote still rings true today.

One of the many efforts to elevate the conversation of the lack of ethnic diversity in the church and to promote a more unified Body Of Christ is “Church Diversity Week.”  Again, as we seek to continue this conversation and begin to truly see the sign on the doors of our churches read, “Everyone Welcome,” we wanted to provide a platform for churches to become a part of the movement.  Church Diversity Week is a globally recognized week to encourage and promote unity within the local church.

This week happens to fall on the calendar beginning the Friday prior to Martin Luther King Jr. Day (MLK Day) and lasts the entire week. There are many different ways to celebrate Church Diversity Week; however, at its core it’s about encouraging and promoting unity and diversity in the church.  You can go to ChurchDiversity.com and check out some of the ides or you can grab a copy of my book, “Church Diversity – Sunday The Most Segregated Say Of The Week” which outlines various strategies including Church Diversity Week.

Without any promotion and simply word of mouth, we have well over 100 churches representing half of the U.S. States, in addition to Ghana, Kenya, South Africa, Peru, Australia and the Czech Republic who have identified themselves as participants.  You can add your church here:

I am happy to announce that last week the Governor of Oklahoma, Mary Fallin signed a proclamation which officially recognizes January 13 – January 20 as “Church Diversity Week” in the State Of Oklahoma. I’m proud of our State leadership and I’m looking forward to continued momentum around the country.  At it’s core Church Diversity is about reaching more people for Christ.

It’s important that our churches have a genuine heart to do as Jesus calls us to in the Great Commission and that’s to make disciples of “all nations.”  It’s also important in the U.S. to be aware of the fact that minorities make up nearly half the children born in the U.S., part of a historic trend in which minorities are expected to become the U.S. majority over the next 40 years. A great reminder of Galatians 3:28, “There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.”

The “tipping point” is imminent when the number of babies born to minorities outnumbers that of babies born to whites.  ”Census projections suggest America may become a minority-majority country by the middle of the century. For America’s children, the future is now,” said Kenneth Johnson, a sociology professor at the University of New Hampshire who researched many of the racial trends.  These trends are representative of our zip codes, our communities, our city, our nation, the world and the church.

There are already plans in the works for next year to possibly implement an entire Church Diversity Month, with a month long small group/Bible study curriculum for the entire church. Some of these materials are available this year, with more to come (click here).  Check out ChurchDiversity.com for more info. or follow @ChurchDiversity on Twitter.

Again, I want to thank Governor Fallin for her leadership and signing the “Church Diversity Week” proclamation.  If you or your church is not involved, jump in and be a part of changing the future of the church.

Is your church participating in Church Diversity Week?  Share any thoughts or ideas that you may have.